A selfish moment for myself
Dont wanna be too self absorbed but cant help it
Just had a disturbing premonition bout myself
Envy the people who knows what they want
And can do it freely
Dont wanna be an old grumpy lady
Sorry bout herself for not doing and not knowing what she wants
Had spent 4 years for a degree
Liked it, but thats not my passion
Then what is my life about?
Like book, but what can I make of it?
Like musics but cant play or sing
Like biology, but then?
Like helping people, so what?
Like so many things, but that wont help me get through my life
Havent found the one thing that I really wanna do
Jeezz.. can anyone help me? I mean REALLY help me?
Wanna keep my options open but till when?
My heart says,
Wanna travel and learn languages and new things
Live my life, live freely as a bird
No money in pockets, just travel and work
Dont worry bout the following days
My mind says,
Go study, go find a decent job
Go find a husband, fulfill your responsibility
To your parents and to yourself
Work hard, get rich, die in peace
I dont think anyone really gets me, not even I myself
Often ask God if (S)He would help me
Now I wonder if I've been given hints
But afraid I act as blindly as cocks would act after the sun sets
My mood and thoughts are changing so quickly
One after the other
Like clouds in the evening sky blown by the strong hard cold autumn wind
Is this just a problem that every 20something gets?
Or would this be a livelong dilemma that will haunt me down forever?
Strangers, friends, or anyone, could you tell me or share what you think bout this?
Just had a disturbing premonition bout myself
Envy the people who knows what they want
And can do it freely
Dont wanna be an old grumpy lady
Sorry bout herself for not doing and not knowing what she wants
Had spent 4 years for a degree
Liked it, but thats not my passion
Then what is my life about?
Like book, but what can I make of it?
Like musics but cant play or sing
Like biology, but then?
Like helping people, so what?
Like so many things, but that wont help me get through my life
Havent found the one thing that I really wanna do
Jeezz.. can anyone help me? I mean REALLY help me?
Wanna keep my options open but till when?
My heart says,
Wanna travel and learn languages and new things
Live my life, live freely as a bird
No money in pockets, just travel and work
Dont worry bout the following days
My mind says,
Go study, go find a decent job
Go find a husband, fulfill your responsibility
To your parents and to yourself
Work hard, get rich, die in peace
I dont think anyone really gets me, not even I myself
Often ask God if (S)He would help me
Now I wonder if I've been given hints
But afraid I act as blindly as cocks would act after the sun sets
My mood and thoughts are changing so quickly
One after the other
Like clouds in the evening sky blown by the strong hard cold autumn wind
Is this just a problem that every 20something gets?
Or would this be a livelong dilemma that will haunt me down forever?
Strangers, friends, or anyone, could you tell me or share what you think bout this?
posted by ina at 12:43 AM
4 Comments:
wah..mbak iki mood swing-e sangar tenanan ;p
grtz
me, the you know who
sopo tho iki yo? koq jan mysterius tenan?
aku bukan cenayang lho rek :D
hey Ina (am not THE YOU KNOW WHO btw)
thanks for all the support ... how R U ?? miss you much sweet!
Ataas
Hey, In..
Lagi feeling low ya?! *peluk peluk*
Well, aku ga bisa kasih solusi apa2 sih In. Tapi, mungkin aku bisa share pengalamanku aja.
Ada benernya juga kalo faktor usia yang 20++ ini membuat kita merasa terjebak dalam pemikiran2 yang tiada ujungnya. Mulai dari hal kecil seperti memilih baju apa yang terbaik, sampai dengan masalah pekerjaan ataupun pasangan hidup. Aku rasa semua itu wajar kok In. Soalnya di umuran kita ini, lagi dalam masa transisi ke jenjang yang kedewasaan tahap 2. Klo mau diingat2 lagi, pas dulu kita masa ABG transisi ke masa kedewasaan tahap pertama, kita juga merasa kebingungan kan?! Cuma waktu itu, masalah yang kita hadapi masih lebih sederhana, jadi kalo dibandingkan ama saat sekarang pasti terasa lebih berat dengan bertambahnya masalah + kerumitannya.
Aku belajar dari teman2ku disini bahwa hidup itu terlalu indah untuk dilewatkan hanya dengan berpikir apa yang "sebaiknya & seharusnya" kita lakukan. Jalanin aja hidupmu dengan melakukan hal2 yang mengejutkan, karena dengan adanya spontanitas itu baru kamu akan merasakan bahwa otakmu bisa berpikir tentang hal2 yang fresh dan tidak monoton.
Aku belom 100% sukses melakukan spontanitas dalam hidupku, tapi aku sedang berusaha. Dan aku rasa memang itu adalah satu2nya hal yang bisa kita lakukan supaya kita ga bosan dengan kehidupan kita.
Kalo kamu bosan ama dirimu sendiri, cobalah lihat orang lain. Jadikan dia sebagai panutan kamu, sehingga kamu bisa belajar hal2 yang baru dan mengasyikkan.
Hope it helps! Miss You!! ^___^
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